Friday, January 15, 2010

Response Message to Rachael

Racheal, I left another comment after your last one, but since you don't seem to have a blog here and haven't left a blog URL, I thought I'd post here on my main page too with hopes you'll see this my friend:

Hi Rachael,

Ah, now I know what you speak of.  You were speaking of our bureavement group.  There was one couple who lost their baby as we did.  He was 30 weeks.  10 weeks shy of delivery.  She was at a hotel and gave birth all of a sudden.  Her experience was like mine and while WE had closure (bacterial vaginosis...which now we know is because bacteria got into the cervix due to the mucus plug) the other couple had no closure because there were no answers from the placenta testing.  She asked if we had any answers with hope that THEY too may find them.
The couple your referring to is a whole different couple.  They both carried a gene that caused their child to have several birth defects.  He couldn't live with how severe they were and thus, he passed.  Leaving them sad, frustrated, but now with closure that they should no longer ttc with the genetic disorder.

We don't have that genetic disorder.  as the last couple.....our story is similar to the first couple who just seemed to dialate too early.  Though mine is something due to the mucus plug which in most cases stays in.

Some wise words for you dear friend...With a new pregnancy, you could drive yourself to tears with all the things that "could" happen.  The books that not only show you each trimester, but give you worst case scenareo's, testing for birth defects, etc.

I will tell you with my experience that it's something you shouldn't get too focused on or you will not find JOY in your pregnancy.

I had JOY in my pregnancy. I felt AWESOME in fact.  Better than I had in years.
My situation CAN happen, but it's not all too common.  In most cases, when a mucus plug sheds, if a person is LISTENED to as the nurse said above, you can still keep the baby from bacteria by what's called a cerclage...or tie the cervix and bedrest.

As far as birth defects.  I denied every testing, because we would keep the baby anyways.  When we had a second thought about testing jackson with the "bloodtest only and sonogram" for birth defects, none took.  We decided that was Gods way of confirming exactly how WE felt.  So we didn't pursue.

But please know that you'll scare yourself and take away from the JOY in pregnancy if you look too much into the negatives.  LISTEN to your body and when something doesn't feel right, follow through.

Thats what my message is about.

Much love to you dear friend and may you have a healthy and JOYFUL pregnancy in Jesus name.  AMEN

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